What about Socialization????

Here are some definitions...  One is the definition of socialization and one is a definition of popularity. 

Definition of SOCIALIZATION

: the process by which a human being beginning at infancy acquires the habits, beliefs, and accumulated knowledge of society through education and training for adult status

http://www.merriam-webster.com/medical/socialization

pop·u·lar·i·ty/ˌpɑ:pjəˈlerəti/noun

[noncount] : state of being liked, enjoyed, accepted, or done by a large number of people : the quality or state of being popular

I have only been homeschooling through Ohio Virtual Academy for this school year, and this question is by far the most asked.  It is often the first question asked...and the one that drives me crazy the most.  Let me just say...first of all...what is the main purpose of schooling?  Is it not to learn concepts and be educated and increase your intellegence?  I (call me old fashioned) think learning is one of the most important things that should happen at school.

I however have come to believe that perhaps people who ask this question are confusing the term socialization with popularity.  I guess I could be wrong, but I don't think so.

Socialization as the definition states: Is the process by which a human being beginning at infancy acquires the habits, beliefs, and accumulated knowledge of society through education and training for adult status. 

Ok.  So we are to socialize our children by teaching them how to function in society as an adult.  I take that as teaching our children how to act, communicate, and  follow the social norms of society. 

For example:  My children should be able to act appropriately in social situations, be able to speak intelligently and use a fork and spoon. :)

Where in public brick and morter schools does this "socialization" training occur?   On the bus, where 4 letter words fly off the toungue?  Is there someone there to itervene?  Maybe the bus driver tells them to knock it off...maybe.  Does it occur in the hall way before class?  Where kids are bullied?  Bumped into, called names? Does it occur during lunch hour when the talk turns to sex?  and who is doing what with whom?  Does it occur after school when kids are making out in the hall or by the bus? 

I am 41 now...but it has been awhile since I have been to an "adult" gathering where 4 letter words were flying and people were talking sex and showing everyone how...maybe I go to dull parties. :)

If I was at such a party...I would certainly leave.  At school kids are exposed to this all the time, but they can't leave. It is day in and day out. If you don't participate in this form of "socialization" you are usually rejected and deemed "unpopular"

The definition of popular is the state of being liked, enjoyed, accepted, or done by a large number of people.  We all want to be accepted.  I think that is a natural and normal feeling.  You however have two choices often in public school.  Follow the crowd (doing things done by a large number of people) or not follow the crowd (stand up for yourself or your beliefs)  Following the crowd perhaps makes you popular, but it doesn't make you socialized.  I think of when a fight breaks out at school...the kid might be popular and others will circle around the fight encouraging the fighters to hit each other, everyone wants to be there because they will be left out of the "group" and "action"... I however don't think anyone would define fighting as "socialized" behavior.

The other thing that irkes me is that popularity often has absolutly nothing to do with how people treat each other.  In public school it often has to do with who your parents are, how much money your family has, what kinds of clothes you wear, if you are a good athelete etc.  Being a good person and a good student often doesn't qualify you for popularity...in fact often just the opposite.

I think when others ask "what about socialization" they really mean, "what about your kid being popular?"  If we really think about socialization and what it means, I would say most people could be socialized by a few ettiquet classes, and by watching other adults interact appropriately with each other. 

Newsflash...being or trying to maintain popularity in a same age peer group can lead to bad decisions and life altering choices.  I think we all know this, and at the same time have a desire to be part of the crowd.   Nobody wants to be disliked or left out or treated badly.  Yet it happens every day to kids all thoughout schools everywhere.  Yes, it is part of life... but when it becomes your life...when every day is a living hell...when you have done absolutely nothing to deserve such treatment...it is depressing and awful.

Will my child be better "socialized" by having to deal with bullying every day of his life?  Will my child be better "socialized" by learning bad language?  Will my child be better "socialized" by being exposed to drugs and alcohol?  Will my child be better "socialized" if he attends parties where alcohol and drugs are being served?  Will my child be better "socialized" if he has a girlfriend?  Will my child be better "socialized" if he is having sex?  The answer is no.

He might be more popular though. 

Catch up post

Here is a post that is long overdue.  It is just a bunch of pictures on my camera from most of December.  So here they are in one long post.  We had a great Dec and holiday.  It was fun and we had lots to do.  My mom was here for the month and that was a great help in the Christmas department.  It is much more fun to shop with her than with Steve :)  Did I type that?  Sorry Steve. 

Curt's Baptism

Doug passing out programs!

Family Dinner Out at Parasson's...my favorite!

Jacob straw action shot

Doug whats with the hair? 

Christmas morning...

We found Maggie a spaghettio shirt.  She lives on that yuck...

Can you guess who got Jacob this gift...yes...Steve.

January

I have been waiting to have something spectacular to write.  Still waiting. :)  In January we have been really hitting the homeschooling hard.  Maggie finished up her vocabulary and spelling units for the year.  Now we are concentrating on harder subjects.  Jacob is doing mid term tests this week.  He has his spanish today...say a prayer...

Steve is doing great with his weight loss plans and has lost over 40 pounds to date.  I am very proud of his efforts.  I on the other hand...lose 2 gain 3 lose 3 gain 1...etc.  I am not getting anywhere.  Trying would probably help my situation? 

Doug and Curt are still determined to stay in "regular" school.  We tease them and try to entice them, but its a no go.  

I am worried about grades for both of them.  I think things get glossed over and once you miss something you are out of luck, unless you figure it out yourself.  Meanwhile, it effects your grades until you figure it out...if you ever do.

Schooling has been fun but does seem to take over life at home quite a bit. 

I have to download a bunch of pictures soon and post them.  Like I said before, schooling is taking up most of my time. 

Have a great day.  I have to go grade Maggie's Literature Semester Assessment.

Merry Christmas

From our Home to Yours!

BBBTBB...

Hello all...This post is titled BBBTBB.  It stands for what we have been doing lately...

Birthday #1 Jacob turned 15!

 Birthday # 2 Maggie turned 10

Broken Arm...Pretty isn't it...

 Thanksgiving

Birthday #3 Curt turns 8!

Final B...Bloody noses...Don't worry...it was scouts and they were learning first aid.  Fake blood. :)

If you are wondering why Maggie is at cub scouts...cause she is the only girl around and they often ask her to help.  Her friend Cody is in the background.

Laundry made easy

I decided to create a family closet. I was tired of picking up socks all over the house. The children would leave their clothing everywhere. It was in their bedrooms, it was in the living room, it was at the front door, dining room, and even in the bathroom. I moved every bit of clothing that the children own down to the basement where the laundry is located. I cleared off shelves and found a cheap way to make little cubbies for their of smaller items. Surprisingly everything fit. We did go through all the clothing the children own. The laundry chute empties into this area. We made a changing area for the children to dress and undress in. We put up a curtain for privacy and they take turns getting dressed. It has worked out surprisingly well. They are happy because they no longer required to take their clothes upstairs and put them away.

Changing area

Each child gets their own shelf.

Hanging Church Clothes

Sweater hanging thingys. One for each kid to hold pj's, belts, undies, ties etc.

4 hooks for pj's that don't need washing yet.

Baskets...one for girls socks, one for boys white socks, and boy dress socks.

The washer and dryer are right here.  So I wash and fold and place on their shelf and laundry is done!  I also have bins for summer stuff that we can switch out for the season.
This has been the best thing for me. If you have any space to try a family closet I recommend it highly. Another great the side effect is the fact that the children have a lot more room in their rooms for their things. They now can use their closets for toys and other things that they want to keep. Their rooms are also staying cleaner because they're not throwing clothes on the floor when they change. It took me about a day to set up everything. There are lots of online resources about people's family closet. This has been revolutionary.

Homeschooling

Homeschooling has been wonderful.  Maggie is a good student and doesn't give me much trouble.  It does however take about 5 hours of my day. Therefore, I don't have much time left to blog.  I have been working on our church's Primary Program for the last little bit, trying to write the darn thing.  This Sunday we begin practicing with the kids.  It is a bit later than most Primary programs, usually it is in Oct/Nov...but we are doing ours in Dec.  We had a huge change of staff...with our choirister moving and getting a new pianist.  Oh dear.  It will be fine...

So I have been busy. 

Plus another fun note.  Steve broke his wrist playing church basketball a week and a half ago.  He just went today for a check.  He will be out for 3 1/2 more weeks.  No working...
No working = less income.  Nice.  (that was sarcasm)

This might be the lamest Christmas ever. 

Although...Grandma is coming...so the kids will be spoiled and probably won't notice the lame gifts we get them anyway. So that is good.

No working = Being home all day every day.... (need I say more)

He also can't do any fix it projects while he is home.  He can't move his hand.  So he is kind of going stir crazy and we have 3 1/2 weeks to go.  My mom is coming on Sunday...and it will be thanksgiving and Christmas.

I love to decorate for Christmas...I do it when Steve is at work...cause he hates it.  He will be home this year...what fun (sarcasm)

He is going to drive us all nutso...I mean...I love being home with my hubby.

Wish me luck,

Julie

Slightly more craziness...

Well since my last post, Maggie has come home to school at home with OHVA too.  So it has been busy around here. We set up a classroom and got all the supplies and we are off and running!  It has been lots of fun so far.  Luckily we enjoy each others company.  We are together A LOT.  The two other boys said NO WAY!  That is ok because I think I would freak out with two more kids to school.  I would probably just handle it but it is nice to start slowly. 

Jacob is doing great in his classes so far.  Straight A's with the exception of Spanish.  I hope he doesn't have my language gene...hopefully he has Steve's.  One semester of Latin was more than I could handle. 

Doug finished up his Cross Country season. He did well.  He seemed to really like it and he wants to do it again.  I hope he runs track this spring.

Curtis is Curtis. Pretty happy go lucky.  He is playing soccer this year, but is considering football next fall...he should he is about 2 inches and 10 pounds heavier than the bigger kids in his class.  He is SOLID!  As Steve says..."ya can't teach them to be big"

Maggie is playing soccer too.  She wants to start flute lessons.  Hopefully we can make that happen too. 

One more week and soccer will be over...yeah!  Hip Hip Hurray! 

The best part is that I am going to the temple on Sat.  I haven't been in a long time.  So I am looking forward to the peace that is found within the walls.  I am driving so I hope we don't get lost!  I also hope it is easy and I can feel more comfortable making the trip. 

I was really hoping for a temple announcement in Kirtland, or at the John Johnson farm...two church sites that are close.  I am greedy I admit it.  I can't even imagine living in Utah where there are temples less than a half hour apart.  That would be awesome.  It would be like zipping out to the store...as opposed to 2 weeks of rearranging schedules, dealing with kids, finding time to be gone all day.  Plus gas money to travel. 

Oh well..I will stop whinning about it...

That is all for now.  I think Maggie is about ready to get started on a new lesson.

Dad, My Hero....by Maggie

My hero is my dad. My dad is really funn.  He always makes really funny comments and knows every joke.  My dad is also very smart.  He can answer any math question.  He helps a lot with homework.

My dad is very kind.  He built me and my brothers an awesome clubhouse with beds, a table, and everything! I want to be just like my dad.

Maggie

A Day in the Life....

Well I inspired myself...to document a day...in the life of me...cause I am sure I will block it all out...much like childbirth. :)

Here goes.

On the way to Seminary.  Dark.  Oh and Mr. Opposom...that we see each morning...was dead on the road...and he wasn't playin' possom either.

kiddos in the car...blurry like my eyes.

Doug and Maggie munchin' on breakfast.

Don't judge me...poptarts are the breakfast of champions...right? 

Munching over...time to rest again.  I love Curts hair. 

A Little Scripture reading.  I skipped over some...so and so begat so and so...and also the "he took her" "he layed with her" and harlot stuff.  The old Testament is kinda racey.

Back home. Only went 70mph on the highway to make it in time...Time to brush teeth in the dark.  While we wait for the bus.

Lucy patiently waiting to go out when I get back in the house.

Loggin in to find out Jacob's school work for the day.

Jacob at "school"

Laundry Mountain...Put in a load.

Sweet husband making me some breakfast.

Breakfast.  We are trying a low carb diet...Did you know everything that I love...is a carb.

Going to Kohl's, Walmart, Marc's, and the Goodwill...

On the road again. About 9:30 I suppose.

Cute driver.

Riding in the car...

Found this at walmart.  I saw some people reading it in bloggy land.  So I got it...and read about half so far.

3:30  Cross Country Meet.  Doug's home meet. 

Starting line.

Muddy mess.  He came in 8th.  That was good.  I can see him pushing harder with each race.

Dinner made by Steve.  I was STARVING!

Before dinner.

Found maggie a sweater at goodwill for a buck. 

Nagging kids to do their piano practice.  Got one.  She looks happy doesn't she?

Homework.  Why does the little one always have more than anyone else? 

Had to help Jacob fulfill his Physical Ed requirement.  So we chose yoga.  Deep breathing and stretching puts me to sleep.

Got the kids to bed.  Its time for me to call it a night.  Laundry is still drying.  Got to check email and of course facebook.  Then lights out.